We all like to believe we’re rational decision-makers. Yet, sometimes a sharp email, a loaded question, or an offhand comment sends us spiraling into frustration, defensiveness, or even outright anger. These moments—commonly known as emotional triggers—can feel like irrational overreactions.
But they’re not random.
In fact, our emotional triggers offer powerful insights into the unconscious judgments we carry—about ourselves, others, and the world around us. When we shine a spotlight on them, we can better understand how our emotions shape (and sometimes distort) our perceptions and choices.
Lets think about what emotions reveal about your judgements.
What Is an Emotional Trigger?
A trigger is anything—an event, a word, a behavior—that provokes an outsized emotional reaction. Triggers aren’t always explosive; they can also show up as withdrawal, resentment, anxiety, or a sudden shift in tone or behavior.
What makes something a trigger isn’t the stimulus itself—it’s the meaning we attach to it, often unconsciously. That’s why what triggers one person might not affect another at all.
The Link Between Emotions and Judgments
Emotions are data. When we’re triggered, our nervous system is reacting to a perceived threat—not necessarily to our safety, but to our identity, values, or beliefs.
Under the surface of a strong emotional reaction, there’s usually an invisible judgment at work. For example:
- You feel dismissed in a meeting.
You might unconsciously judge: “They don’t respect my expertise.” - You feel panicked after negative feedback.
Your judgment might be: “I’m not good enough.” - You feel anger when someone challenges your idea.
Perhaps the judgment is: “They’re trying to undermine me.”
These automatic judgments are often remnants of past experiences, personal narratives, or internalized fears. They color how we interpret reality—and how we respond to it.
Why This Matters for Decision-Making
When we’re triggered, we’re not seeing clearly. We’re interpreting the world through a narrowed lens, and that lens is often shaped by fear, ego, or past wounds. In this state, we:
- Make reactive, not reflective, decisions
- Misread other people’s intentions
- Create stories that aren’t fully true
- Damage relationships and trust
The more self-awareness we bring to our emotional responses, the more we can slow down our judgment, widen our perspective, and respond with intention rather than instinct.
How to Use Triggers as a Tool for Growth
- Notice the Reaction
The first step is simple awareness. When you feel a surge of emotion, pause. Label it. “I’m feeling frustrated,” or “I’m feeling dismissed.” - Ask: What Story Am I Telling Myself?
This helps uncover the hidden judgment or assumption. Is it about your worth, their intent, or a fear of failure? - Check the Facts vs. the Narrative
What actually happened, and what are you interpreting? This distinction can prevent you from spiraling into false conclusions. - Explore the Root
Triggers are rarely about the moment itself. Ask: When else have I felt this way? Often, you’ll find a deeper pattern or belief at play. - Respond, Don’t React
Once you’ve explored the emotional and cognitive roots, you can choose a response aligned with your values—not your defenses.
A Final Thought: Triggers Are Not Flaws—They’re Flashlights
We often feel ashamed of being triggered, as if it reveals weakness or lack of control. But in reality, triggers are some of the most honest signals we receive. They highlight our values, insecurities, expectations, and unresolved stories.
Now you know what emotions reveal about your judgements, you can transform reactivity into insight—and insight into more grounded, strategic judgment.
Your emotions are not the enemy of reason. They’re the gateway to deeper self-awareness.
Want to think more about how our unconscious affects our decision making. Read “Unconscious Bias: How Unconscious Assumptions Hijack Your Decisions“.
For some more info on how emotions affect judgement try “the power of emotions in decision making“.